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Fight the Power! Brought to You by the Power

www.newyorker.com
4 min read
fairly easy
Meghana Indurti humorously imagines a press note from a soda manufacturer exhorting customers to fight capitalism by buying more of its products.
The world is more divided than ever. The rich are getting richer. The poor are getting poorer. Women are getting older. (Yikes!)

Photograph by H. Armstrong Robert / Getty

That's why we at Eville Soda Company™ believe it's important to fight the powers that be. To dismantle the system. To think different—just like Martin Luther King, Jr., did.

In an ever-expanding global world, it's become increasingly vital for trillion-dollar corporations like us to make more than a profit. To make more than a delicious soft beverage.

It's time for brands like us to make a difference.

A systemic difference. We're not one of those companies that just stands for regular old difference, like in 2009. In fact, we added "systemic" to our mission statement in 2013—before our factory in Laos was flagged for human-rights violations. Before we even had to.

Pretty progressive.

So, how do we fight the power?

With our new, radical line of sodas. Sodas for the modern world. Sodas made possible by listening to the people. Sodas for activists and change-makers like you.

Introducing our Green New Cola™. Now that's a big deal. It's our first-ever soda to have less sugar and greener packaging. And we donate one per cent of our profits to poor farmers in Laos, O.K.? So, Human Rights Watch, get off our backs.

We also have a new Drink the Rich Cola™, inspired by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. You'll want to drink it in front of your rich parents and force them to…
Meghana Indurti
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